I’m sure I wasn’t the only one who wept at the end of Netflix’s searingly important drama Adolescence, when Stephen Graham’s character tucks his son’s teddy bear into bed and whispers, ‘I should have done better’.
They were ugly, snotty tears, the kind that take you by surprise. The tragic truth underpinning the fictionalised drama was unavoidable: our boys need better. Our girls deserve better. We all need to do better.
Even if you haven’t watched it, you’ll have heard the conversations echoing across the country. From coffee shops to school gates, daytime TV to late night radio, we are finally addressing the issue of modern masculinity head on and the corresponding need for strong, positive male role models.
My heart has cheered to see Graham and Ashley Walters, the show’s other adult male star, generously share the power of their vulnerabilities.
And I can’t be the only one whose mind has turned, quite naturally, to sport and its transformative power as an antidote to the issues being discussed, even before the prime minister Keir Starmer started quoting Gareth Southgate.
Last year, the Youth Sport Trust reported the happiness and health of children and young people in the UK were at an all-time low, with their mental health and wellbeing among the worst in the world.
The children’s charity drew a direct correlation between a lack of activity and an increase in time spent online, a perfect storm which clears the ground for the kind of toxic indoctrination to which we are seeing our boys subjected.
I have long advocated for the need for social media – and we as users and literal influencers of algorithms – to promote, like and share accounts that show to boys and men of all ages what healthy masculinity looks like. The role models are out there, we just need to shout about them, give them the prominence they deserve.
Allow me to present one such shining example. His name is John McAvoy, and after following him on social media for years, I am fortunate enough to now count him as a friend.
The debate around the influence of role models on young men is crucial to John’s background. At the age of 24, he was given two life sentences for armed robbery, having already served time as a teenager. He spent a decade in high-security prisons.
The stepson of one of Britain’s most prolific armed robbers, John grew up surrounded by organised crime in south London. It was all he ever knew. When his best friend died in a high-speed police chase, John had something of an awakening.
Turning to sport, he committed his mind and body to excellence, using a prison rowing machine to break three world and eight British records for indoor rowing. In a six foot by 12 foot box, he completely turned his life around.
John is now one of the most energetic, passionate, fun, infectious forces for good I have ever met. He is truly an exceptional human and the very best example of the kind of man we can all look up to.
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He has committed his life to bringing sport to kids from inner cities and now runs the Alpine Run Project, introducing hundreds of young people across the UK to trail running in nature. The six-month programme sees up to 1,000 youngsters come together through sport, with a select number getting to travel to the French Alps to take part in the world’s most iconic trail running race.
His goal is to take young people, specifically from lower socio-economic backgrounds and give them a chance to connect with the world around them, to develop and recognise their inner strength and to learn how to literally move through a world that can be so desperately uncomfortable for so many.
His graduates have gone on to launch careers in music, fashion and media. The end point doesn’t have to be sport but it’s where the confidence and inspiration are born. Applications are open and I urge any of you with access to youngsters between the ages of 16 and 23 to share the link below.
What the current conversation reminds us is we cannot sit back and bemoan the misdirection of our young people any longer. As a society, we all suffer when our kids are radicalised, but we can all be part of the solution. We all need to be part of the solution.
- The Alpine Run Project is still taking applicants for 2025 http://www.ybb.agency/alpine-run-project#apply
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